i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
