It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
