I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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