Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
