Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize