That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
