I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
