how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
