I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
