Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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