Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
