there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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