Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
