We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
