The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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