Nicole vs. Life
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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