I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Randomize
