I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
