belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
My dick has a subreddit
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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