im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
