So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
