what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
