He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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