So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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