Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize