Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(469): View more from Texas

is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?

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(561): View more from Florida

My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.

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(219): View more from Indiana

I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.

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(970): View more from Colorado

He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys

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(941): View more from Florida

I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.

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(+61): View more from Australia

Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...

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(650): View more from California

I've never known a porn star before

(650): View more from California

There's not even an emoji for this

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(305): View more from Florida

Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.

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