She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
