I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
How external is "for external use only"?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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