I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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