How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize