There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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