Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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