What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
