I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
