no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
