Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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