people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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