Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
