He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
