are you still at the devil's house?
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Randomize
