Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I am naked and annoyed.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
