No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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