Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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