guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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