It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
pray to the hookup gods
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
