He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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