please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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