I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Do vagina's smell?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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