Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
