The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
