your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Vodka?
Forever.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
