Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
