I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
